Back to Reality

I go back to work tomorrow. I really like my job, but I'm having heart palpitations knowing The Lad is only 3 months old. When I returned to work with Little Miss she was 6 months old. Even though it's still quite young I feel at 6 months old they are a little more able to cope with the change. 3 months is just so young. Why does the government make it so hard for us to be able to afford to stay home longer? Inside my little heart I just really feel the need to be close to my children right now, and my ultimate goal is to be a stay at home mum - which I am hoping will be possible by the end of next year just in time for when Little Miss starts school.

I think that since having The Lad my whole attitude about being a parent has changed completely. Poor Little Miss was used to being lugged all over the place (I don't think that was entirely fair on her either)  and I feel that I did a lot but it was at her expense... sometimes I feel that I didn't put enough time into her little life so far, and it's gone by so fast already, I feel that I've missed out on a lot. When did she become so grown up?

I've decided that I will just do what I need to do to get by in this life right now, and that I will put all the rest of my energy into my little family and what's best for them. Is that mean??

For now while The Lad is young, he'll be coming to work with me 3 days a week and staying home with my Nana for the other 2. You do what you gotta do to make things work aye?